Ok, so I was originally going to find a list of questions people have for asexual people and provide my own answers for them here, but when searching for that I found an article by CNN. It’s covering a research study that was a questionnaire involving asexual people. The topic? Masturbation and Fantasy. The researchers were basically testing the assumption that Asexual people are completely devoid of sexual desire. Now, hopefully you know that’s not the case.
Asexuality lies on a spectrum just like “normal” sexuality. Not only can we experience degrees of attraction, but we can experience degrees of comfort with/desire for sexual activity. We can even have kinks just like the rest of the human population.
Degrees of Attraction basically goes:
No attraction (Asexual)-> Some Attraction (Gray-Asexual, Demisexual)->”Normal” Attraction (Not Asexual).
For comfort/desire of sexual activity:
Sex Repulsed/Sex Negative (Doesn’t desire, may abhor sexual activity)->Sex Neutral (doesn’t desire but doesn’t mind)->Sex Positive (Cupiosexual, desires sex)
Now, this might be oversharing but I’m a truly Asexual person who more specifically identifies as Add to dictionary, meaning I actively desire sex. I just don’t look at a person and desire sex with them directly. I generally desire sex with people I’m romantically attracted to.
Well, the researchers essentially found that most asexual people fantasize. That would put most asexual people as at least being sex-neutral. (I’m presuming here) However, there’s a phrase used in the article that I want to respond to:
“The key takeaway, again, is that when it came to fantasies and masturbation, there was simply less of a difference between the sexual and asexual groups than one might expect.”
This phrase highlights a problem that asexual people face daily, no one understands what it is. Many people don’t believe we exist and even those that do don’t think that we actually have sex or on any level desire sex. People need to be educated about sexualities as a whole and asexuality absolutely must e a part of that education.
Though, there was an interesting point brought out in the study. Many asexual people will fantasize in a 3rd person set up so the situation doesn’t involve them. I may look farther into the study do see what’s up with that.
Read the article Here.